Celebrate Life 20th May 2020

I crawled out from under my mosquito net to another day of life alone.
I celebrated that I was still strong, healthy enough to tackle the day ahead. Filled with a million happy memories hugging me in the early morning.
That first cup of steaming hot coffee just kick-started my day.

Dragged all Jeff's belongings upstairs into storage for kids to come and rummage through once this whole fiasco is over.
I rent out holiday rooms and found my one locked cupboard I now wanted to use, where I stored Jeff's military attire - his black Jackets with their badges on and his formal top with his medals - open and attire all stolen.
I wonder if they realise what happens when you steal from Gods own family?
I am not sentimental but I pray they ended up in a collectors hands.
Ag well you know what - you can't take it with you, I can attest to that.

Morning spent with Estate Administrator. It has been strangely comforting digging through the documents of our life together to find everything they needed to tie up the estate.
Fortunately because
Jeff Knipe
 nearly died just on a year ago, I had started a file - it's called 'Read me first' - My kids will appreciate this one - ha ha, I planned to be a control freak from the 'other side'. It contained everything they needed including our yellowing anti-nuptual contract, marriage certificate, fading birth certificates, a list of all our policies with the number and the relevant insurance agents name and contact details. Tax numbers, investments at which bank, right down to the pin numbers to unlock our cellphones etc etc.
If working for 35 years in an academic library taught me nothing else, it taught me the value of paying attention to the finer details in life. In Dewey even the numbers after the point are important.
The rest of the day I sorted out my new found space in the now empty drawers and cupboards where 'my heart' had stored his things. Although my own heart ached as I 'packed Jeff away' delegated to a storage box, yet I was strangely at peace knowing he had always cared for me proved by being surrounded by the worldly provisions I now hung up.

Sweet memories came flooding back - his grumbling, his ready laugh. Holding hands in the mall and sharing an illegal chocolate as we watched hours of cricket together while he patiently explained for the umpteenth time, how the sport worked.

I'm gonna miss my Teddy Bear but we celebrate Life with our memories.

While his worldly possessions may be stored away with mothballs, his presence and gratitude for all he did for me and mine, is very much alive and is firmly locked into a special place dedicated just to him, in my heart forever - this will be the memorial to a great man



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